SI Application Forms

I am applying for Saint Ignatius High School next year and they of course ask for a student application form. Here is the main question they are asking. Please give me your feedback!!!

The question asked you to describe someone who has been important in your life. I chose my personal idol Nelson Mandela. This is my response to the question...

"There are many people in my life that I emulate, but the one person I chose to live my life as I think he would is Nelson Mandela. The first black elected President of South Africa may be an odd idol to have; but ever since my family and I visited Robben Island three years ago, I am constantly thinking about the difficult choices he made. Mandela was put in prison for attempting to better a racially segregated country; when he was finally freed he was not bitter, he was stronger and he used this strength to unite a country. I believe he has touched my life in a way that drastically changed my views on everything I knew; I believe he made me strive for an education in hopes that someday, I may impact this world as he has. Although I have never met Nelson Mandela, I don’t believe that makes him any less personal in my life; he has taught me to forgive but never forget, so that I may grow and learn from all of my hardships. I have also learned to appreciate everything I have, and to give back to those who were not so lucky. I now know that it is not race or religion that separates people, but the fear to become stronger if you unite, for some people think power shared between two cultures is not power at all. The question remains is, how could Mandela be anything less than inspiration?"